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Innocence. Flat. Boring. Annoying. Weird. Unconditionally. Lazy. Wrong. Always wrong. Loose. Failed. Emotional. Lonely. Sick. Hate. Ill. Hate. Bad. Enough.

I read Webtoon. I know may things from it. I see many characters. It seems like I meet many people. I learned something from it. I know Adelia and Adimas from Pasutri Gaje. I learned about romance story of a young married couple. I saw how they calculate their micro economy. I read Juki and I saw honesty, innocence, simplicity. Juki made me laugh oud loudly. I read Dr. Frost, Alice, Egnooid, 90 Days, Terlmabat Jatuh Cinta, and many others. I got so many things about life from that online comic. I got many lessons, sure. I like it. It is just a simple (very simple) thing that can make me laughing, happy, and forgeting my life. It gives me a break. I thank to all creator of all comics at Webtoon. Thanks guys, you colored my days!

I read Webtoon until 3.00 am. I was sleeping for three hours when somebody shaked my body, screamed at me, and annoyed me. I knew nothing but angry. I was very angry with the way they did. I have told them how much I hate the way they did. I know they had a good purpose with the bad, bad, and bad way and hate it. I truly hate the way they did no matter how good their purpose. What's better? Overslept or adverse them all day long? You may think I am bad and they are good. It's okay.

My smartphone are old enough. It is two years old now even more. Its color is white at the first time. Now, the white is getting cream. The paint gets peeled of the body. The power button is broken, or maybe error is preciser. It also has a problem in charging. When I use it out door, it has problem often with the power button. Suddenly it turns off or restarts by its self. Rain ever rains it when someday I was rained on the way to somewhre. Then somebody came bringing a better smartphone and offered it to me but it has given to my brother and he has become happy of getting new smartphone and the person still offering me the smartphone and offering to talk to my brother and the person mocked the smartphone of me. I could even approve that kind of idea, absolutely! It was just silly, 100%. Perhaps the person has a good purpose yet again and again the way is truly not good. How sad is a boy when he has no gadget (although he doesn't need any gadget yet cause all he does with the gadget is plating video game), someday he got a good gadget and became happy yet suddenly the gadget was taken away from him by the reason it is not for him, it's for his sister and he got his sister terrible gadget. It's unfair. Another unfairness was when you say you want to give something to someone whom needs it and you were just kidding and not truly serious with your talk. What kind of the person like that? You have no conviction. Despite of your good purpose of giving something to someone, the way you did it was absolutely bad  and unapproved. If you want to give somebody something just give it. You need not to humiliate him/her or to hurt his/her feelings. If there are two person you need to give them all. If you can not give them all just give one of them without  hurting another :)

It's okay perhaps I need to be more patient with my lovely creamy smartphone. I dreamed a new smartphone when I go KL yet perhaps I need to stay with this smartphone now. No matter how many the damages, I need to be patient right here right now :) I don't wanna new smartphone now if someday I will get a war. 

I am sad right now right here, and who cares? No one but my self :)

Smartphone disruption is over, with my self. Do I need to talk about it with them? No, I don't think so. If I talk to them, I have known what will happen. It is not used, just wasting time and energy. They will defense whatever I talk and agreements even win win solutions are truly impossible. It is better to keep silent. There is no democracy but hierarchy.

From now on, I don't wanna ask. What for I beg of my right? Even they will not give me if I don't beg them. Since I go out of this place, they won't give me if I don't beg. I am tired of begging. Why sould I beg? When I decide to stop asking them, how can I fulfill my needs? From where I get the money? When I have no money, what should I do? I can write yet it's hard --"

Salary of assistant has been not given yet. I have a busines yet it has not given me profit. Joining essay competition is hard, so is another writing competition. Using my brain to think since writing needs  brain. Some competitions must pay registration. After sending the essay, I still need to wait the announcement. Still, there is two possibilities, win or loose. :"

There are other problems still. KL administration and KKN of course. I have become so tired of this KL, so have my friends. KKN needs much money and I have save my money. I need to prepare one million on February. On January, I live in Jakarta for almost a month. Can I hang on my self? From where I get the money? Can I stop asking for my parent? I am peevish of my father and I can get any money from my mother. She will ask me to ask to my father and I hate it .__.

These two people are going to defense me. I am like their enemy. Like what I have written in the long paragraph before, "There is no democracy, but hierarchy".

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